Right there are two things wrong with the picture above, firstly I purchased a double whammy pack of custard creams from Aldi which I regularly do as they are a favourite with my son. As he grabbed a couple from the tin we noticed that one of the biscuits have been put on the wrong way around. Have you any idea in a house of Autism how disturbing that is?
Was the custard cream maker a bit hungover when putting these together or did they do it on purpose because they were just sick of them looking so neat and well, correct. It's not sitting well as the biscuit doesn't feel right when handling and I need to see 'custard cream' written on both sides, it's scandalous, I have never experienced such faulty biscuit trauma before. I mean yes I have bought the boxes of broken biscuits but that's different. I do think if they had been spotted at custard cream quality control that's where they would have ended up, in broken biscuit land.
I think we'll cope and they have nearly been eaten, so there's definitely nothing wrong with the taste so that's ok, phew!!.
The other thing this picture shows is glitter in food, who the heck thinks is right to put glitter in me food??? Now I am not a fan of glitter at all. I don't like it on Christmas cards, I'm glad that my boys are older and we no longer have to stick it on a creative project and as a florist I have to bite my tongue if someone suggests glitter on flowers. I will provide them because the customer comes first but I don't enjoy it anywhere near me.
It's bad enough that it gets everywhere on the outside of my body and all around the house let alone it coating my insides. I'm just thinking if I died mysteriously after a three course glittery starter, followed by a roast glitter dinner and glittery profiteroles. Can you imagine what would happen during my autopsy? They would open me up and feel not sure whether to investigate my death or get streamers, balloons and have a party. I'm waiting for that to pop up in the next series of Silent Witness.
I've just seen footage of glitter gravy being poured on a dinner and it's not right! It could be quite amusing on the way out though. One's poo would be sparkling wouldn't it? Instead of a fart you could be mistaken for a firework display, the thought of entertainment from a digestive system full of glitter is amusing and the possibilities are endless.
When glitter ended up in food and the toilet it was usually because kids had half a ton of it still on their hands at a party while reaching for a bowl of Wotsits at the buffet, it was classed as a misfortune or accidental, not deliberate. Well maybe it's the season, I know tinsel was making a comeback but this is going well too far.
Let me know how you feel about glitter in your food, there's bound to be those who think it's great and and good on you for embracing the party in your tummy but it's just not for me. To the custard cream factory, I can just cope with the biscuits being the wrong way round but please do not even think about blinging the custard up in between them. 'Pimp my Biscuit', oh the mind boggles!!!
Thanks for reading today, hope you've had a giggle, I certainly have. Please come back again tomorrow for my Verse for Thursday.
Take care for now.
What to Buy Wednesday
From May 2020 I will be writing a poem about something I may have purchased or would like to purchase.