I'd like to be a baker on Bake Off
I'd like a stopper I could really show off
My cake it would be fine
with lemon and a hint of lime
Must be great to be a baker on Bake Off
My pastry would probably not bake
I'd pipe icing that would turn into a lake
No Hollywood handshake for you
just a quizzical look from our Pru
I better not even think about going on Bake Off
I really wouldn't know where to start
to bake a prize winning tart
My ingredients would go everywhere
flour and sugar mixed in with my hair
I've a feeling I may not be on Bake Off
I don't know if I'd like the technical bit
with vague instructions that don't really fit
I'd get in a muddle
and need a great big cuddle
I'll leave the Bake Off for now
I admire their patience and desire
as they rush around and perspire
A passion with a glimmer
oh who will be the winner
of The Great British Bake Off 2017
Good luck bakers!!
Thanks for reading today
Come back tomorrow for Free From Friday
Oh my ageing bladder was the inspiration for a verse this week. As I've got older I seem to spend more time on the toilet, I suppose that's quite normal and approaching the menopause too. I'm not complaining, ageing is a privilege denied by some people at my age so I am thankful for the body I have, even with it's weak leaky bits and stretch marks too.
So here goes, a poem about my bladder.....enjoy!!
Why do I always want the loo?
I'm permanently on the throne it's untrue
My bladder's a tad bit shady
and I have shares in Tena Lady
Not kidding I'm forever on the loo
It's always a bit of a trick
to find somewhere blooming well quick
I'm crossing my legs
Give me a toilet my body it begs
I'm desperately needing the loo
Is it childbirth that did this to me?
or middle age that makes me want to pee
Is it too much drinking?
Or is my bladder just shrinking?
Who knows? I just always need the loo
It's hard for a girl to take a quick leak
there's dignity required and a technique
To squat somewhere rough
from waist down in the buff
Oh no I prefer a proper loo
I may shock a farmer
or come face to face with a Llama
With knickers pulled down
the wildlife would frown
No I need to be going to a loo
Who knew one could write a poem about wee
toilet humour is always the key
It's really quite funny
having a bladder that is runny
Goodbye now I'm off to the loo
I know!! probably too much information but it does make me giggle sometimes not too much obviously as I need to prevent any accidents. If I go out for a walk with my son and I even mention that I've got to visit the toilet he will throw his arms up and say ' yeah I know you've got to go to the loo' as if in despair!! When you've got to go, you've got to go I reply.
Thank you for reading today and please come back tomorrow for Free from Friday (promise to leave the toilet humour behind).
Take care for now........
I just couldn't decide what to have to eat yesterday, I wasn't in the mood to cook and ended up in the end having a bowl of bananas and custard because that's all that I fancied.
I thought I would use my lack of appetite as inspiration for my verse today.....
I don't know what to have for my tea
my appetite seems to have left me
My stomach it rumbles
but my brain it stumbles
on what I should have for my tea
It's not that I haven't been shopping
my cupboards are positively popping
I'm not being lazy
just feel a bit hazy
deciding what I should have for my tea
I've already cooked for the kids
but for me something forbids
Ok I'm watching my weight
and some foods I have to eliminate
but there must be something to have for my tea
I'll snack a bit and see how I go
to test if my hunger will grow
I'm not going to get flappy
as Slimming World will be happy
that no syns were used with my tea
Nope nothing tickles my fancy
a takeaway would be way too chancy
It would be very quick
but I'd be stuffed and feel a bit sick
no not having that for my tea
Maybe I am a bit tired
with nothing really to be desired
I'm off to see what I can do
get off my arse, try something new
then.....I'll have something for my tea
Thank you for reading, I'll be back tomorrow for Free from Friday.
Do you ever get those days when you can feel a sore throat coming on, your nose tingles and you think you're on the way to having a cold but then it doesn't turn into anything. It just lies dormant, teasing you into thinking you are going to be miserable, snotty and with an annoying tickly cough.
I just hate it when my immune system can't decide what to do. Are we letting this one in boys? Maybe not then and it decides to kick the colds ass. Today is National Poetry Day, the theme being freedom and so I give you my poem about my non existent cold, maybe it's delayed or it may be a post flu jab reaction.
Freedom from a Cold
Are you going to be a cold or what?
And turn my nose into a mass of snot
I'm feeling really achey
and also a little shakey
Cold, show yourself or kindly go away
My throat it feels like sandpaper
my perfume has turned into a menthol vapour
Strepsils that stick to your fingers
the lemony taste, oh how it lingers
Am I having this cold or what?
I'm stuck in mid fever
not ill but not well either
I can feel the suspense
is it real or just pretence
Be a cold or please go away
Maybe I shouldn't really moan
my nose has not got to be blown
I'm carrying on as I should
hang on that's really good
I may not have a cold after all
I was jabbed with a flu vaccination
could be that, a little reaction
They said a fever I could expect
and probably feel a little effect
That would make sense of it all
I may be just good at being immune
it will all go away very soon
no cold to be had
got away with it - not bad
Atchoooo..... oh famous last words
I hope you enjoyed that and I would just like to say
whether you're a professional or novice
a very happy
National Poetry Day.
Thanks for reading,
pop back tomorrow for gluten free feeding
My head I shall bow
so you take care for now.....
and a little later - sleep tight
It was Roald Dahl Day yesterday and I couldn't let it pass without dedicating my Verse for Thursday this week to him. What an amazing man and an amazing writer. He wrote stories that got kids reading, not only that he made reading fun and he created the most amazing chocolate factory ever.
So for him and in honour of this literature genius I give you my verse for today.....
Books which everyone can understand
children and adults in every single land
They join altogether
whatever the weather
and read to their hearts content
You transformed us to different worlds
lands and adventures unfurled
from the BFG
to Charlie's Chocolate Factory
Reading would become so cool
Your books are really funny
loved bedtime stories as a mummy
Imagination would go wild
whether you're a adult or just a child
A delight Roald Dahl a delight
Who could forget Tales of the Unexpected
the seventies I've just recollected
They were tricky to get the gist
and always ended with a twist
Even on tv your stories shone through
I admire your ability to rhyme
an inspiration you'll be for all time
Not only for me
but the whole world would agree
You're the best Mr Dahl just the best!
Thank you for reading today, I will be back tomorrow for Free from Friday so until then take care.
I went for a walk yesterday and stopped off for a sit down on a park bench. As I sat there I felt the seasons changing, yep right there in front of me it turned to Autumn. It may have been the fact that the park had lost the hustle and bustle of it's summer visitors, the ice cream van had gone and it did feel a little chilly. It just felt different. This inspired me for my verse today so I hope you like it.
I noticed it yesterday while out for a walk
it was like a good friend who was leaving and would no longer talk
A sad farewell for another year
goodbye to the Summer, for now Autumn is here
My son, he insists it's called 'Fall'
who am I to argue, he's way to tall
We sat, chatted and took in the view
him with an ice lolly and me with my brew
It's back to school and college tomorrow
I sense some excitement, definitely no sorrow
A new uniform for some to wear
early mornings and being told to 'brush that hair'
Will we be organised and all on time
it would be a miracle and totally sublime
I have two teenagers what could possibly go wrong?
Should I invest in a fanfare or a bloody big gong?
I haven't missed going on the school run
the roads they'll be busy - oh what fun!
Not for much longer, a year now to go
my youngest will go to college, for him a bus I will show
So we say a goodbye to the summer
I'm so sad, it's such a bummer
I don't like the dark nights
wearing jumpers and big woolly tights
I suppose it will be cosy, a bit chilly but who knows
we really don't have a choice, we'll go with what flows
Maybe Autumn will be sunny, sticky and warm
an Indian summer would suffice and totally against the norm
Whatever it is it's another season we have been given
happy tales, holiday snaps and everything forgiven
As on we go, the future to be had
just pop on a cardigan and let's all be really glad.
Thanks for reading, I will be back tomorrow for Free From Friday.
For now take care......
I thought with all these cooking programmes and all these wonderful chefs working so hard to get us cooking I would take it on myself to be a bit creative with the family dinner. I thought I would surprise my teenage boys by not just dumping mashed potato on their plates but piping lovely swirls on, just like they do on the telly.
So out came my piping bag, yes I do have one, a bit like me it doesn't get out much but it's still functional. Popped my mash into it, screwed the biggest nozzle on that I could find and piped away. It was all going well until I realised my nozzle probably wasn't big enough and I pushed a bit hard. The bag burst at the seams and the bit of mash that was left burst out at super speed from my piping bag. I looked everywhere thinking it must be on the floor or up the kitchen walls but the potato had landed quite nicely onto my plate like as if the process had been wonderfully choreographed. So the boys had swirls and I got a massive dollop of potato. I'm thinking I may need to practice a bit more.
This inspired my verse for today. Enjoy...........
I piped my mashed potato like a Masterchef winner
all excited, looking forward to our dinner
I presented it to my son
who said 'whatever have you done?'
I've piped the mashed potato!
It's hard to impress a lad
teenagers look at you as if you're mad
I probably expected too much
a round of applause, a fanfare or such
But I piped my mashed potato!
Wallace and Torode would have showered me in glory
straight through to the next round would have been my story
Presentation a ten
and get to come back again
Because I piped my mashed potato!
Cooking it has it's disasters
no need for stitches or plasters
But my bag was overloaded
and across the kitchen it exploded
Maybe I shouldn't be piping mashed potato
The mash it busted from the seams
like my trousers after the dish of my dreams
My nozzle was too thin
the whole thing ended up in the bin
But I managed to pipe some mashed potato
I may try again another day
a bigger hole I'll have underway
Fancy dollops and swirls I shall make
my bag I will try not to break
The next time I pipe my mashed potato
Although it ended in a bit of a disaster I really enjoyed it. I haven't laughed so hard in ages. I just wished I had filmed it. You see all these you tubers creating fabulous culinary delights but maybe I could be the learner cook who just creates the mistakes but gets there in the end. What's a bit of mash over your camera eh?
Thanks for reading today, do come back again. I will be returning tomorrow with Free From Friday which is a look at my gluten free diet. It's all going on here!
Take care for now.......
Lemon Drizzle Cake, gorgeous eh? I have not got that function built into my brain that says 'no Sue from the Brew, you cannot eat that because you are on a diet'. I get a bit excited when I see gluten free as well as it can be rare sometimes and of course you all need to know about this cake. It's research at the end of the day really, isn't it? Please say yes.
My verse for today is about this naughty adventure I went on with the cake! Enjoy.....
What ever did happen to my diet?
The cake it did fall in my gob
it was something I just could not stop
The lemon was drizzlin'
my mouth was a sizzlin'
What ever did happen to my diet?
A latte to accompany my cake
a rest, a sit-down, take a break
All frothy and milky
and positively silky
Whatever did happen to my diet?
I looked at the cake and it said
'I can see ya gal who likes to be fed'
I dug in my fork
cut cakes don't really talk
Whatever did happen to my diet?
It really tasted so good
I am so fond of a pud
I lose my concentration
give in to the temptation
Whatever did happen to my diet?
Calories galore but there I sat
cake is great when you're having a chat
There's always an excuse
for all this abuse
What ever did happen to my diet?
So back on the plan I must go
eliminate cakes and gateaux
Oh it just stinks
Mr Kipling will be gutted me thinks
Whatever will happen with my diet?
I'm off to have a serious word with myself and maybe sit on the naughty step or go out for more cake, ha ha oops!
Thanks for reading. I will be back tomorrow for Free from Friday so join me then.
Take care for now........
It isn't very summery at the moment. We seem to be experiencing a lot of rain and cooler temperatures, much too cool for August. This may be my fault. as the temperatures seem to have plummeted ever since I bought an oscillating fan from the last heatwave we had a few weeks ago so I may have jinxed the summer. Not used it since I bought it, typical eh? It is sitting in my living room just longing to be used.
Hey it could be super hot though just like the rest of Europe, may have to be careful what I wish for as that is the extreme of summer. Sitting here writing this post though this morning it does seem to be brightening up slightly so fingers crossed everyone lets hope we get a bit of summer after all.
This inspired me to write my verse for today, hope you like it.......
Where Has The Summer Gone
It's more like bloomin' autumn
August needs a big kick up the bum
The sun I believe has shone
but where's the blinkin' summer gone?
We should be doing some sweatin'
but instead we are doing more frettin'
Got an umbrella anyone?
Oh where has the summer gone?
Cool and cloudy it seems every day
looking very dodgy as some would say
The dark clouds have jolly well won
but where has the summer gone?
The rest of Europe have got it hot
maybe we should be thankful for what we have got
School holidays the kids are upon
So where is the summer? Just where has it gone?
I believe it is coming our way
brightening up, maybe today
A day trip we're going on
So prove to me summer's not gone
I'll just have to wait and see
if the high temperatures are meant to be
Is this weather just all a complete con?
Or is the summer really all gone?
It's the typical British way
get on with it, come what may
Thicker stuff we are said to be made from
I don't believe it's all over, and this summer has all gone.
Optimistic eh? Well a bit of positive thinking doesn't do anything any harm, lets just hope.
Thank you for reading today, join me again for Free from Friday tomorrow.
Take care for now.
We all went out for a walk the other day. Yes I managed to drag two teenagers out for an afternoon out. It was lovely to spend some time together in between the huffs and puffs, and classic teenage grunts. They were a bit reluctant because I had prized them away from their gadgets and favourite things to spend time with mum. 'The fresh air will do you good' I said, they look at me as if to say they would rather suck vintage mouldy pickled eggs.
I think they secretly enjoyed it, I know I'm loved as they tell me every day. It is hard though to organise days out in the school holidays especially at this age as they like to do their own thing now and I totally understand. When they were little I could just scoop them up, pop them in the car and take them everywhere. The thing is that now I suppose I can just take myself off and have a bit of independence but I like my time with my boys. My eldest will go as he loves have a walk but I don't believe in making them do anything they don't want to, I was going my own way at their age but you forget don't you?
This gave me my inspiration for my verse today, I hope you enjoy it..........
Walk with Me
Walk with me boys
just now and again
Before you become older
turn into young men
Walk with me lads
it's not really a chore
The locations I choose though
maybe a bore
Walk with me chaps
it's good for us you know
Before my knees give in
and I'm living in a bungalow
Walk with me my son's
it's time I enjoy
Time is so precious
no need to be coy
Walk with me guys
for soon you'll fly the nest
I can then stop annoying you
yes, finally a rest
Walk with me now
as you make me so proud
One of you so quiet
the other one SO LOUD
Walk with me you two
as memories are made
These moments remembered
life's footprints are laid
Family can mean good friends and lovers too. So enjoy your family time in which ever way you spend it. Make the most of it as family time is precious time.
Thanks for reading, join me tomorrow for Free from Friday.
Take care for now......
A Verse for Thursday....
is a chance for me to share some of my poems I have written and also my favourite poems from other writers, hope you enjoy them.